Log in

No account? Create an account
*~Who you want to be, who i wish i wasnt~* [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

(no subject) [Nov. 26th, 2009|12:07 am]
i NEEEEEEEEEEED something more exciting.

and i KNOW You do too.

PLEASE help me out.
link3 comments|post comment

(no subject) [Aug. 11th, 2009|03:54 pm]




thanks; that's all.
linkpost comment

fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk [Apr. 5th, 2009|04:44 pm]
yeahhhhhh she's gone again. This time it WAS definitely my fault. fuckkkkk. i got some SERIOUS making up to do... but it's probably done.

we'll see.

why can I only fall for crazy girls?
link4 comments|post comment

(no subject) [Apr. 1st, 2009|03:03 pm]
last night was probably the most amazing night of my life. I 100 percent completely honestly postitively think we were in love in another lifetime and we've found eachother yet again. i can't even fucking explain it. like seriously i don't understand this connection.

Kidney stones then hour long conversation "i wish i could take your pain away... actually i will" next day my kidney stones are gone.. all pain GONE... and then Caity has to go to the doctors and gets kidney stones.... reading eachother's mind... trust. every little thing you do. the way you make me. The contentness and comfortability of it all. and i don't get overly emotional when shyt goes down, but yet i would fucking KILL someone for her. like people say that... but i would fucking KILL someone. words seem so pointless... they just can't even come close. What do you say when "i love You" doesn't even describe anything near what we have? nothing. just read my mind because beacuse my brain is filled with the feeling .. not simply words. SHE understands. and when i read her mind... it's the EXACT same thing. we are like the same person. you aren't going anywhere any time soon. I am not going anywhere any time soon. i've had a long time now to figure out what "Love" really is. and i really think she is the one. it's weird saying that and fully believing it's true for the first time. fuck words, i'm done. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, baby. i ain't scared at all. You are fill to this 21 year void.
linkpost comment

no, you won't ever get too far from me [Mar. 31st, 2009|07:30 pm]
i think she's gone again?
haha who knows. Crazy girl. I think she's sleeping over tonight though cuz she's at the gym with Sarah and Mike right now... and she did the same thing last night; slept here although she was 'done'. I wish i didn't like this. I love her.

could you let me go? i didn't think so.
linkpost comment

i'm soo fucking in love [Mar. 23rd, 2009|08:04 pm]
my baby surprises me! and i got kidney stones this morning at like 2 am and she was there for me. but i didn't make a big deal cuz i didn't want to worry her. But then 9 rolled around with no sleep... just painful cuddling... and we went to the hospital. she's fucking incredible... she snuck into my hospital bed and hung out with me while i was on a bunch of injected morphine. I was screaming at the bitch nurse to get my fucking baby... and she wouldn't so i started talking a bunch of shit... i was like breaking my bed cuz i was in so much pain.... you have no idea.. i just wanted her to be there so i could hold strong... and then i would burst out in laughter cuz it was the only thing that was keeping me from tears.... and the bitch nurse was like "what's wrong? and i was like fuckkkk my life and your damn system... then the Morphine went into me and i felt it immedeatly... i looked at the nurse as i layed down and was like "i'm sorrrrry..... thank you.... i love youuuuuu! haha. then i went into the MRI, came back and my baby was there to lay with me. amazing.

She's so complicated, impulsive and unpredictable at times... but i understand her like no one else... same for me... not to mention i don't even get mad at half the shyt she does. it's just like i know why... and she's soo similar to me that i understand... our shit lasts like a minute. Oh yeah, and that fight we got into on saint Patty's day; she felt the same way i did... like everything could have been done right there with the shyt that we were saying... but we both had so much bottled up aggression that we needed to get out and it was fucking amazing. She said the same thing i was thinking "i just wanted to fuckk you so bad and scream at you and fucking Love you. which is sick cuz we're not usually like that AT ALL. we're really good and don't fight, same tastes, we understand eachother and communicate well... just some times you need to say FUCK FUCKING YOU.

she's mine all mine. and i'm hers all fucking hers. She makes me a good boyfriend... i make her a good girlfriend. we are so similar it's not even fucking funny. but when we're together we're two different people completely. Two Better Fucking People. She is my twin.
linkpost comment

now my hearts needs a polygraph, i was so eager to pack my bags, when i really wanna STAY. [Mar. 19th, 2009|10:20 am]
[music |i'm Yours.]

she's back. We fought for 6 hours on st patty's day. I'll never talk to you again when i'm 20-something deep and half a bottle of whiskey... the fight was kinda needed in my opinion tho... establishing boundaries and being honest and what not.... 20 minutes of it was just saying "FUCK YOU" and "NO fuck YOU". pretty bad haha. but then the morning came and she apologized... and so did i and now the air is clear. So yeah, come by for a while, baby. (:
linkpost comment

(no subject) [Mar. 15th, 2009|12:04 pm]
i love her. she's crazy. so i left her last night. maybe she'll prove herself to me. maybe she won't. All i know is i'm not heartbroken like i was last week. and that feels amazing. I like my alone time. I like my clear head. I lovvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvve my friends. and i realize now that i have everything a man could ask for.... i just get so bent because all i want in this life is a family.... but i'm so fucking cursed to find someone cuz i only fall for the crazy ones. i like it that way. And i'm finally at Peace with it all. I'm finally as strong as i thought i could be. I AM TRUE FUCKING WATER. true. water. with a mind. Maybe i'll never find what i'm looking for. maybe i will. but now before my head hits the pillow... and when it first arises from it.. i know that i have everything. It's a good balance. she was a good test.. to prove that i can just be in love and lose all the complications that go along with it. i can shut my mouth now and just be good. Thank you, baby. I hope it's you that gets to see that for the rest of your life... but if not i know now i can do it for someone else. Anyone who deserves it.
linkpost comment

(no subject) [Mar. 14th, 2009|04:01 pm]
my baby came back !!! i'm so glad i finally fought for someone.. and ssuceeded. i nevver thought i could be a good boyfriend. but you mmake it easy. you make me wanna be better i love you.
linkpost comment

some times perfection can be, it can be perfect hell [Mar. 10th, 2009|04:03 pm]
she's gone. it hurts when it all becomes real. this sucks.
linkpost comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]